Wilde Thoughts Of Oscar

Why did Oscar cross the road? Because he had a Wilde thought.

Archive for the ‘Wilde News’ Category

F**k buddies on F**ebook

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There are only two media forms that have an insanely high rate of WTFs per minute. Obviously, The Daily WTF is one of them. Rediff is the other one.

I present you this piece of evidence to prove my point [1]. It is an article in which a delightful young lady shares her thoughts [2] about her latest movie.

Evidence 1: The title – “People can relate to ‘f**k’ buddies”. ThisĀ  has multiple WTFs embedded in various levels. Firstly, people can relate to what? Can they also relate to thumb s**king Oompa-Loompas? Secondly, what’s with the letter masking? It’s not even a valid regular expression! If you are trying to find all four letter words beginning with f and ending with k, use ^f[a-z][a-z]k$. What the fuck is f**k?

Evidence 2: The quote – If you keep on reading the article mindlessly like I did, you would encounter the following lines.

Relationships are quite complicated these days. People want their own space and freedom. Ishaan has taken the help of Facebook, which solves people’s problems.

Earlier, we had the hero’s or heroine’s best friend, who would try and bring the couple together. In Radio, Facebook plays that best friend. That’s what pulled me to the story. The concept of Facebook is very today and everybody can relate to it.

Rediff, are you sure it’s not F**ebook? Also, Facebook solves what? On the contrary, Facebook is known to ruin relationships and cause wreck. Facebook is not a concept. Search engines, networking websites and f**k buddies are concepts. Google, Facebook and the heroine of the movie are implementations of those concepts [3].

Final evidence: The comments – I swear, I am not making this shit up. The image below is an actual snapshot of a few comments on this article. Interestingly, they are in increasing levels of WTF. Just to make things clear, I am *not* one of these people.

I rest my case.

[1] About Rediff, not The Daily WTF.

[2] Thoughts might be a little exaggeration. They are a more primitive form of brain waves that are emitted by homo sapiensĀ  lagging behind the evolution curve.

[3] Respectively, I should add.

Written by ow

December 1, 2009 at 7:22 am

Posted in Wilde News

Dear God, I Have A Complaint

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Want to meet the Pope? Join these people.

After centuries of praying for a local glacier to stop growing, Swiss villagers are now seeking an audience with Pope Benedict to get his blessing for prayers against the global warming that is causing it to recede.

This will make Rajasekhara Reddy happy. He won’t look so foolish anymore.

Written by ow

August 7, 2009 at 9:44 am

Posted in Wilde News

Nabi Azad shows Indira Gandhi how it is done

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This is a very tricky one. Can’t choose between Balika Vadhu and Savita Bhabhi.

Bonus: Joey would want Savita Bhabhi in Balika Vadhu.

Written by ow

July 18, 2009 at 11:25 pm

Posted in Wilde News

The Argumentative Indian

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Have you heard what Mr. Shivde, whose name rhymes deliciously with a very pleasant Hindi obscenity related to the male anatomy, has been saying?

Shiney’s lawyer: “The maid watches Xena the warrior princess. She definitely maybe learnt survival and defensive skills from the show. Also, she is a fan of Kareena Kapoor who can easily defend herself against Shahid Kapoor raping her, Jabhi they meet. Therefore e = mc^2. Prima facie.”

The fun doesn’t end there. The prosecution is clearly having a ball with this case.

Prosecution: “Medical report is strong enough to nail the accused. Though the victim had no external injury, the medical report supports our case that sex was forceful.”

Seriously? Nail the accused? It has got to be the meanest word play ever.

Written by ow

July 12, 2009 at 1:02 am

Posted in Wilde News

Salt Water Rains

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Monkey urinates on Zambian president.

Unless the monkey was protesting the newly passed monkey law about not urinating in public, that is not news. Anyone can get peed on. So what if that person happened to be the president?

Masala for you: Imagine same thing happens in India. These will be the headlines in different newspapers

1. Lord Hanuman graces our president with holy water.

2. Delhi’s kaala bandar is charged with pissing on the president.

3. Opposition party trains a monkey to humiliate the president. Assembly halted for a day.

Written by ow

June 27, 2009 at 3:00 am

Posted in Wilde News

Roop Ki Rani, Nanga Choron Ka Raja

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This is why you never play truth or dare.

Extra fries for you: If that were a bollywood movie, the answer to the mystery naked runner puzzle is the hero of the movie itself. He does that because either

1. His mother is terribly ill and she urgently needs french fries to live and he is too poor to buy french fries and too poor to buy any clothes.

2. A friend of the heroine asks him to prove his love by stealing french fries and he is too rich to wear any Indian clothes.

I am sure John Abraham would be interested in playing that role.

Written by ow

June 27, 2009 at 2:34 am

Posted in Wilde News

The Times of Young India

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Do you see the irony in this? Would this help?

A media entity writing about the ill-effects of media on kids. Especially an entity which has horrible effects on kids.

Written by ow

June 4, 2009 at 3:21 am

Posted in Wilde News